Do you self-sabotage?

There are different definitions of self-sabotage, but the one that impacted me the most was this one: “The act of destroying or damaging something deliberately so that it does not work correctly” That is how I feel about myself when it comes to relationships or getting involved emotionally with someone, I always fuck it up. There is something about my behavior that changes, and it … Continue reading Do you self-sabotage?

Making a collage as a present for someone with images I recycle and they choose

So it was my roommate’s birthday, and I wanted to try this for a while. To give a collage as a present, where the person chooses the images, and I represent something afterward. This is how it started. I have images already cut, kept in different boxes, so it is very easy to choose. A joint and Apolo are always part of the picture. . Continue reading Making a collage as a present for someone with images I recycle and they choose

The Ups and Downs of January 2021

This month was full of ups and downs, emotionally speaking.We are very busy at work, but the moving of location is not fully confirmed yet, and we can all feel the stress in the air. We are still closed to the students and continue the online lessons until Feb 7th. However, it looks like a lockdown is coming, Covid cases in Spain continue to increase. … Continue reading The Ups and Downs of January 2021

Why do we do the things we do?

I´m always asking myself this type of question. I was depressed for many years and it was difficult to enjoy life in general. Now that I´m older, I found many tools that help me appreciate life and I don´t feel depressed anymore. However, I´m always analyzing my behavior, is like constantly checking for red flags, in case that feeling becomes overwhelming again. So whenever something … Continue reading Why do we do the things we do?

Man can easily give me a fucking headache

I liked this guy, but he is too complicated and he is giving me a headache. I don´t quite understand his behavior, but is definitely passive aggressive. He doesn´t say no to see me, but he is always too busy to arrange a day and makes sure to emphasize how little important I ‘am. If you want to see someone, you make the time for … Continue reading Man can easily give me a fucking headache

I´m a highly-functional smoker

Of course, that when I’m not high I´m much faster and sharp, but overall I can manage to do anything. Don’t get me wrong, I don’t drive or put myself or others at risk. But I talk about the everyday routines, walks, cooking, cleaning, doing my collages, doing laundry. All those activities that you know by heart already. However, sometimes I wonder how much weed … Continue reading I´m a highly-functional smoker

Blogging is saving me thousands on therapy

I never wanted to tell my parents I was molested when I was a child. I tried to protect them from the pain. A therapist once asked me: “Who was protecting young Cata love when the abuse was happening?”. I was the child and they were the adults. She said I kept inverting the roles. I kept it as a secret for so many years. … Continue reading Blogging is saving me thousands on therapy

I actually like spending New Years by myself

It´s the third year on a road. Since I settled down in Barcelona in 2017. Prior to Bcn, I have always spent New Years with roommates, co-workers, in parties. There were always people involved. There´s a beauty in having this privacy. Usually New Years are kind of emotional for me. Not in a way bad, but I get more introvert. This year have made changes … Continue reading I actually like spending New Years by myself

The time I had a gun pointed at my head and I was still fired from the fucking Coffee Chain

It was 2011, after being heartbroken, I was too emotionally drained to pack my bags and leave again. So I stayed in my home country for a year and a half. I rented an apartment in Palermo, Buenos Aires with one of my best friends. He was gay and called me “his marida”. I worked for almost a year in an HR job and things … Continue reading The time I had a gun pointed at my head and I was still fired from the fucking Coffee Chain

Are we now dating with a mask on?

If if was difficult to find a partner pre-pandemic, how difficult is it going to be post-pandemic? Don´t you feel lonely sometimes? Is always me against the world, but I wonder how would it feel if it was us? Maybe we should start dating with a mask on. But did you notice how much of a difference it makes when you can see someone´s full … Continue reading Are we now dating with a mask on?

January 2020 versus December 2020

I started this year being on the edge of an emotional breakdown. I had a corporate job that I worked really hard to get. It was the job that I thought would be my dream job. I actually hated everything about it. Back on January 2020, I was trying really hard not to show my disappointment at work and I’m a good actress. It was … Continue reading January 2020 versus December 2020

Sunday Morning joint while wearing lingerie by myself at home

Why not? For me, is a perfect plan. I´m used to being alone, although I live with my cat and he is the best partner to be honest. I have always kept a distance between me and other people. I´m not attached to people, family or friends. I can easily live with a huge ocean in between us and not be upset about it. The … Continue reading Sunday Morning joint while wearing lingerie by myself at home

The time I got a job at a ski resort without never seeing snow in my life.

Back on 2003-2004, I was young and I wanted to travel really bad. I come from a country where the local currency is shit, so travelling around the world was a difficult dream to accomplish. I was going through a difficult time and I was very depressed. I saw a psychiatrist who put me on heavy medication right away. It didn´t feel right. Medication didn´t … Continue reading The time I got a job at a ski resort without never seeing snow in my life.

What if I don’t know how many guys I fucked

If you ask me a number, I have no fucking idea. I tried once to make a list, but I had so many one night stands that I lost track. Alcohol was heavily involved and sex was mediocre, so does this even count? Of course it does, but it goes straight to the “black list of fucks”. People might ask: If you were molested as … Continue reading What if I don’t know how many guys I fucked

The night I got fucked up in Lake Tahoe

For many years, I went out partying, drunk tons and fast and I would black-out completely. The fucked-up thing was that I would be dancing, talking, fucking, and doing who knows what else, but on a conscious mental level I did not know what I was doing. I think it was back in 2007. I was working abroad, I recently broke up with my ex … Continue reading The night I got fucked up in Lake Tahoe