Today I was down when I woke up. It was difficult to get out of bed. I was hungry, but I couldn’t move. I was cuddling Apolo and it felt so good I wanted to last forever. I had that feeling of sadness and laziness. I just wanted to stay in a horizontal position all day long. One therapist once said to me “Don´t let … Continue reading Horizonal position
Among other things that are new in my life, I’m also starting to grow my own indoors cannabis. I don’t know what the fuck I’m doing, every step forward takes longer cause I need to watch tutorials for everything. There are some accomplishments thought: I was able to set up the tent and set up the ventilation system by myself. Setting up the extractor was … Continue reading Kitlandia needs help
January 1st Today I needed something sweet. I´m trying to save money, so instead of buying more things, I took a look at my pantry and mixed what I had. I ended up making cookies with chocolate chips and nuts, some delicious vegan sweets. Every time I try a different recipe, as I have different types of flours, nuts, flavours and textures in general. Today … Continue reading Ideas for Vegan Snacks
No idea how this year will be. Is a different world and my life is different as well. It will take a while until we go back to the “normal life” , but what if that life never comes back? Before the pandemic I always had this feeling that something was going to happen. The world was becoming more and more fucked up, it was … Continue reading Welcome 2021
It´s the third year on a road. Since I settled down in Barcelona in 2017. Prior to Bcn, I have always spent New Years with roommates, co-workers, in parties. There were always people involved. There´s a beauty in having this privacy. Usually New Years are kind of emotional for me. Not in a way bad, but I get more introvert. This year have made changes … Continue reading I actually like spending New Years by myself
If you check out the post “The night I got fucked up in Tahoe” you will know that back in 2007, I spent a night in prison in California, USA for public intoxication. I was released around 8am on a Sunday, with no money, no keys, no id, no phone, apparently I had nothing on me when I was detained. It looks like a got … Continue reading 9 am date after spending the night in prison
Don´t judge me, I never said I was a perfect vegan. There´s a supermarket that sells affordable vegan cheese that satisfies my needs, however…. sometimes I open the fridge and the non-vegan cheese calls my name. It doesn´t happen often, but I think is nice to be honest about it. When I´m a bit down and things don´t make sense, is difficult to continue to … Continue reading Sometimes I steal my roommate´s cheese….
It was 2011, after being heartbroken, I was too emotionally drained to pack my bags and leave again. So I stayed in my home country for a year and a half. I rented an apartment in Palermo, Buenos Aires with one of my best friends. He was gay and called me “his marida”. I worked for almost a year in an HR job and things … Continue reading The time I had a gun pointed at my head and I was still fired from the fucking Coffee Chain
If if was difficult to find a partner pre-pandemic, how difficult is it going to be post-pandemic? Don´t you feel lonely sometimes? Is always me against the world, but I wonder how would it feel if it was us? Maybe we should start dating with a mask on. But did you notice how much of a difference it makes when you can see someone´s full … Continue reading Are we now dating with a mask on?
I know there´s many cat lovers who will agree with me and share the feeling. I absolutely love cats. Everything about them is beautiful. Their faces, their eyes, their paws and tail, their bodies, the elegance when they move. In a second, I feel love for any cat I put my eyes on it. No one else has that effect on me, so why not … Continue reading Perfection exists on the face of a cat
Young Cata love was raised in Argentina, a country that is well-known for its high-quality meat. I loved eating meat, the taste, the texture, the barbecue experience with your friends and family. It wasn´t something that I planned or even picture for myself. It was something that happened throughout my life experiences, my travelling, and my own personal need to contribute to a better world. … Continue reading My vegan journey
Today is December 25th of 2020. Due to Covid 19, for the last couple of months we have a mandatory lockdown from 10pm to 6am. Yesterday it was December 24th and the government allowed us to be back at 1am. I always spent Christmas with my Spanish family, but this year I spent it with friends. I cooked a very nice vegan dinner: seitan with … Continue reading Barcelona has changed…
This year has been different for sure, not just for me, but for the world. I finished 2019 with hopes that 2020 would be better, and I’m not sure how I feel about it. For many people it has been a nightmare, lost of families and friends, lost of their business, and the lost of hope in general. For me it has been different, but … Continue reading Christmas day 2020
I started this year being on the edge of an emotional breakdown. I had a corporate job that I worked really hard to get. It was the job that I thought would be my dream job. I actually hated everything about it. Back on January 2020, I was trying really hard not to show my disappointment at work and I’m a good actress. It was … Continue reading January 2020 versus December 2020
I know this guy for 2 or 3 years. He works at one of my cannabis clubs. Every time I went to the club, I looked at him closely. He is tall and very thin. At the beginning what I noticed the most was how heavily tattooed he was: his neck, his head, his hands. Whenever I stopped by the club I wondered if he … Continue reading Why is it so difficult to connect?
It was 2006, I was 25 years old. It was my second season at the Ski Resort in California. I loved my job, loved the people, I was happy. There was this ski instructor at work. He was English, but was born in Hong Kong and he always called himself “Chino M”. I didn´t work as an instructor, I worked in Admin, therefore, I used … Continue reading “The Chino M”
I´m 39 years old and I do not need human babies in my life. Don´t get me wrong, I love kids, they are cute, innocent, fun, but I don´t need to have one of my own. I look at my cat and he gives me all the love I need. Is difficult to understand why some women think that the only way of being complete … Continue reading What if my cat satisfies my maternal instinct?
It was 2012. After staying at my home country for a year and a half, I was ready to get the fuck out of there. One of my dream jobs was to work at a cruise ship. I did some research in the past on how to apply, and I knew it was from your home country. The timing was perfect. I found the opportunity, … Continue reading “The Canadian love-machine”
Well, Cata was a beautiful, grey, little chubby cat that I rescued from the streets when she was 2 months old. I always had cats, but Cata was my first very own feline. I just settled down in Barcelona, got an apartment that allowed pets and Cata one day unexpectedly showed up in my life. Cata died when she was 3 years. During the 2020 … Continue reading What the fuck is Cata love?
Why not? For me, is a perfect plan. I´m used to being alone, although I live with my cat and he is the best partner to be honest. I have always kept a distance between me and other people. I´m not attached to people, family or friends. I can easily live with a huge ocean in between us and not be upset about it. The … Continue reading Sunday Morning joint while wearing lingerie by myself at home
Back on 2003-2004, I was young and I wanted to travel really bad. I come from a country where the local currency is shit, so travelling around the world was a difficult dream to accomplish. I was going through a difficult time and I was very depressed. I saw a psychiatrist who put me on heavy medication right away. It didn´t feel right. Medication didn´t … Continue reading The time I got a job at a ski resort without never seeing snow in my life.
If you ask me a number, I have no fucking idea. I tried once to make a list, but I had so many one night stands that I lost track. Alcohol was heavily involved and sex was mediocre, so does this even count? Of course it does, but it goes straight to the “black list of fucks”. People might ask: If you were molested as … Continue reading What if I don’t know how many guys I fucked
For many years, I went out partying, drunk tons and fast and I would black-out completely. The fucked-up thing was that I would be dancing, talking, fucking, and doing who knows what else, but on a conscious mental level I did not know what I was doing. I think it was back in 2007. I was working abroad, I recently broke up with my ex … Continue reading The night I got fucked up in Lake Tahoe
I met this guy and I thought that maybe it was happening again. I was going to be able to share more with someone that just a good fuck. But it didn´t happen. Why is it that for some people is so difficult to connect on a physical level and for others is on the emotional level? I can´t help feeling sorry for myself sometimes. … Continue reading Another brick in the wall
Well, I never ever thought in a million years that I would be blogging. But I also never ever thought that I would be this age, and I would still struggle with the same shit. What do I talk about when I say shit? I talk about the feeling of not fitting in. I look like everybody else, but I always feel out of place. … Continue reading Why are you blogging?
I love to fantasize about everything. I create huge stories in my head and I´m so into it. So many expectations are created through this process, that I get exhausted by just thinking about it. It happens a lot with man. I have the face that I show to the outside which is I don´t need anyone and leave me the fuck alone. And I … Continue reading I´m a fantasy machine
Does it happen to you that you want to be happy, and on the surface you have the tools to be happy, but you are not. You are always chasing the feeling of happiness, but what the fuck is happiness? Does it really exist? We are humans beings, we fluctuate through emotions, we can be happy one moment, and be miserable right the next one. … Continue reading My friend: The black cloud
Don’t you agree? Even if I wanted to find a partner, life keeps pushing them away. I´m never the one they choose for one reason or another one. Sometimes I fuck things up with my out-of-control emotions, and sometimes I´m not much into them so I walk away. If you heard of Quino, I have never been a “Susanita”. In my life goals, becoming a … Continue reading There’s nothing wrong with being single
I’m from all over the world. I deal with depression and anxiety every day. I’m a cannabis user. This blog is part of my personal journey, I do not intend to give advices or any kind of shit. I’m a non-stop thinker and that drives me fucking crazy. I believe that I might be at the edge of an emotional breakdown. Blogging seemed like a … Continue reading Why the fuck I´m here